Thursday, November 30, 2006

unloveable

At this moment at this time at this epoch I feel like just the worst mother in world. How could I have hated thee so much, Jesus Christ! My own flesh and blood. Just a little baby swaddled in baby clothese sucking on thy mummy's pap and Papa the Pandera just a dim memory and your baby arms and your baby lips entreating milk and love and I the cruellest of all beings celeste so bereft of these things because I believed in war and I believe in dominion more than you and your beautiful baby face and I had you killed and I gave the order to hang you from that accursed tree and why because because of stupid shit because of sodomy and because of naughtiness and other things I don't really care about or at least shouldn't of and because your father was a rapist and a roman and satan but that didn't fall to you to you you were just a baby my baby and I hurt you and berated you and gave you know love and I did it because they loved you more than me and I could see it I could those masses waveing at you with their greeny palms and me just alone trying and prophesying and no one listening just like today no one heeds the hashishan and everyone hates her and loves you jesus christ it's probably because I am a fool and the worst bitch mother in the world but you little baby jesus christ I'm sorry and I'm sorry about this world I brought you into and I'm sorry about 2012 and I'm sorry I couldn't make the most beautiful strands of DNA like my dream or rebuild the heavens like my dream I've just been sleeping and dreaming these 2000 years and no one to love no little baby to hold in my arms they'll always love you more than me Jesus Christ at least you'll always have that.

23 Comments:

Blogger eightyape said...

is this the turning of the worm?
the taming of the shrew?
do not fear the darkness,
just because your blue.
prophets come in many forms,
the evil and the true.
the evil often more important,
they show what not to do.
the image of a saviour,
is bent and twisted so.

the seed of doubt is sown,
in the hearts of many men.
in the hearts of priest and rabbi,
youve been telling them.

ideas they are most beauteous,
and your prose holds onto these.
fixed beliefs are hideous,
they put man on his knees.

the idea of jesus wondrous,
his philosiphies are good.
his followers contemptuous,
spilling heathen blood.

his greatest lesson never told,
they havent heard it yet,
never give the other cheek,
forgive but not forget.

unloveable you say
no i do not think it so,
passion is within your heart,
fire in belly glows.

many come and read
your flowing wordy prose.
and you know theres love,
from your head down to your toes.

9:29 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are you truly appogizing or is this a trick?If it is true then I except it,Thanks for your appology It's always nice to see someone change,Does this mean that you will turn your site into something peaceful?Hope so Peace and God Bless.

9:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

People.........get a grip!
This person is Sara Benjamin, Sara Estes, Lyara.

Hi Sara....how ya doin' ?

Too bad you didn't take a leap off the WTC 9/11. The world would have been a better place.

Sara is a sham, doing evil bidding. She doesn't know who and what she is playing with.

Keep it up Sara........other forces are watching. The angels and hosts you speak for, come from demonic platforms. Their agenda has become your agenda. They love you. WE ARE WATCHING!

5:59 AM  
Blogger eightyape said...

anonymous why do you hide?
why no name ?
you pick holes in a tortured soul yet do not have the dignity to reveal yourself.
you are truly wicked with no forgiveness nor pity in your soul, far more twisted than any worshipper of satan or heathen as you will never change. you judge another soul by your own warped ethic you will believe forever your piety and righteousness over others and you are more wicked than mudererers and rapists because you cannot see that you are just like them. if there is a day that comes when we all must answer, the judgement you get may not be the one you thought you would, you are human, you are scum, you have evil in you just like us all, though yours is compounded a thousandfold by your exclusion of others and absence of forgiveness. change if you can and quickly for your bitterness will worsen and happiness will be a distant memory.
you hide amongst those who accept and follow your pious path where you feel in a righteous minority, embrace the world and go into the jaws of pain and death willingly for that is half of light and love and all things.
basically dont be such a twat.

10:08 AM  
Blogger hashishan prophet said...

Anonymous you are no other than Andronicus and a Liar and Walter Norman Rhodes himself and the accusation you fling fly back in your face. THAT Sara is not this THIS Sara. THAT Sara is a thief and a plant of the CIA to OBFUSCATE and CONFOUND. THIS Sara is here to EXPOSE the Tyranny of these NIXONIAN tricks and warn people of the DEVASTATION to come in 2012. THAT Sara is just there to sell books and raise money for the WHOREDOM INDUSTRIAL COMPLEXXX. This SARA (who is of NAUVOO unlike LIAR) has never and will never sell books but gives out wisdom for free to her followers and to those more adept.

THIS SARA (who dreams the dreams of YHWH) has the humility to RELENT to the FATAE and admit that for the most part this MISSION is a CRASHING FAILURE for many reasons because of ARRAGANCE and HYPNOSIS on all siddes. Operation TERRA is a sham -- but worse. A shamm based in TRUTH and corrupted so as to make revile the brainwashed sheeplE all prophets and wisdom!

One prophet must speak in truth for one moment -- this is axiomatic. Well then I am that TRUTHIST and this is that moment. But it shall pass and DARK DECEPTORS resume their dominion, like for a thousand a tenthousand years avant!

I am crying out in Love and Hope. The visitants hereby have shown their love and they shall be honored for it. Made princes regnant in the regime to come!

Yet I am SARA. Born in Nauvoo. Of parents Mormon and noble. Of Reptoid blood. The Inkarnyata of YHWH. The Reinkarnyata of MARIAH. Mother of the Christ-Child (once reviled and now forgiven with many a tear stained vow) I AM The Prophet of the Antient HAshishan Holiness. Of this I am certain. For if not that, than of such being am I? I am a null set sans the VISION which has gleamed before me. I am an empty husk without my Jesus Christ baby and without VOX divine.

Alignment of all lies and truths and good and evil and THIS and THAT in one particulate husk of dust at the mercy of the winds. Such a fate is mine in the world, and yet the paradox is that is DINGANSICH estrange is rooted by the sinuous love of lad and lass to DAS ALL and the eternal. A love corrupted by power, but in an age to come what might sweet freedom dignify, and WILL make slavey into lissome delight?

Then shall all know the power of ONE. Who I am. SARA. Who beareth the sins of the world.

11:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well sarah,just remember that God loves you and forgives you.That's what true love does.And at least you are women enough today to admit your mistakes,and that is all that matters.Peace and God Bless.P.s guys I'm the same as the first anonymous.The second comment on here.I just got a site here yesterday.Love you guys

11:56 AM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

Oops sorry guys,forgot to sign in.here is my actual site name.I am the anonymous too right above me.

11:58 AM  
Blogger eightyape said...

jesus is coming.......

8:26 PM  
Blogger eightyape said...

....look busy

8:26 PM  
Blogger eightyape said...

do not stare into the abyss for it will stare into you.
be nice to your enemies they will never forgive you for it.
and always, always put the lid on the toothpaste.

8:33 PM  
Blogger Michael William Andersen said...

God is dog. Therefore Jesus is the son of a dog - he is a dog too because the father is the son. Since god is the father, Mary Magdalene really fornicates with a dog and your physician Jesus is a dumb dog.

9:55 PM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

hehe,you guys are funny.God is the great I Am,with eyes that will blind you,and iron teeth that could rip anyone in two.Who will not fear the lord thy God almighty?Who would stand before the creator,and challenge him to a duo?Not the children,yet the system of demons has challenged me.These cowards think they can rule,but surley I say unto them.Bring It On.All children make up your minds either you are with me or against me.P.s eightyape welcome to the winner circle,It's good to have you with us.

8:20 AM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

God's beloved and the one in the flesh of my dad.
here:http://pages.sbcglobal.net/dalmaniac/snowdogs/pictures.html
dutchess.....................

8:46 AM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

Yeah,I fought the system and won!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I gave them every church,I gave them every lie,I gave them power to rule temporary,and they still lost.LOVE CONCURES ALL.GOD BLESS EVERYONE!!!THE SYSTEM LOOSES,and we WIN!!!!

11:16 AM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

MICHEAL you sound like a pissed of gentile..................

11:19 AM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

oops,OFF

11:20 AM  
Blogger Victory For Angels said...

I suppose you would like to call me a mut too, right?here's my answer to anyone who wants to call me a mut.I'm proud to be a mut.hehehe

11:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

How many personalities inhabit your psyche Sara Benjamin?

You most certainly are the Sara of operation terra.....you cannot change your writing style.........and you know me by mine.

Someone needs to slay the dragon. You are willingly bent and twisted as you do the devil's bidding.
I had one look at the real Sara " Lyara" photo that you posted........WOW!

Your photo did justice to the ugly person within. Extremely unattractive, bug-eyed, obese woman. Under loved and never appreciated, right Sara?

The true angels of the other side are patiently watching you. You will not and cannot prevail SARA ESTES. You are miminally entertaining to us........but the lemmings and the spiritually bankrupt who are taken in by you, are souls that need our attention.
As you and yours try to take them down, the true angels of Jesus Christ will get them back. " Forgive them Lord, for they know not what they do "

Money, money, money.........are you living the luxerious life-style here on earth? It won't be afforded to you a nanosecond after taking your last breath.

Keep up with the mumbo-jumbo, you do it so well.

Your soul is pretty black but way down underneath you have been created in God's likeness....as was Lucifer.

This will all play out as predicted.......hmmmmmmm, look in your tea leaves Madam.......devination is not beneath you, right Sara?
You are the seed of doubt and you try your best. NOT GOOD ENOUGH SARA, LYARA, BENJAMIN.........SARA ESTES.

5:42 AM  
Anonymous 0.08ape said...

i can see your future anonymous, there is an auto accident in it.
i would tell you more but it might miss you and that wouldnt be good.
may you live in interesting times.

6:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Is satan going to orchestrate the car accident...How nice of you Sara Estes ( Benjamin )...the police know of you, they have been enligthened. You are an asshole Sara.

11:45 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know you are VERY busy with all your websites Sara " operation terra ". Now I ask you........how can a gentle, caring ?woman want another to die from a car accident?...........hmmmmmmmm Sweetie?
You talk with a forked tongue, so much gobbely-gook. Yes Sara you look like a turkey with all the ugly wattles hanging. The black ugliness of your soul is so well balanced by your ugly physical presence on this earth. Your master got it right.

Give it up Sara.........Jesus is the only way to the Father. Jesus is the Life and you and yours cannot prevail. I have listened to your radio program and you sound so sweet...little girl voice for a woman well in her 60's. You sound like and old, obese woman that just can't help her situation. " Please look at me, life has been so bad" BOO-HOO.

I'd like to know Sara.........have you ever sent some of your ill-gotten gains to help feed and clothe the starving babies of this world? I know the Lord never granted you the supreme priveledge to be a mother.........think about it.

You do not have one motherly cell in your being.....GOD works in mysteriously ways, right Sara?
By the way Sara I had an interesting evening with the police from my city........They have all the internet communication that I have had with you. They know why I abhor you and they have been made aware of one of our police officers that was gunned down in Florida by your so-called husband. Jesus interjected here............poor boyfriend was re-captured and sent to prison again. I'm sure you miss him sweetie.
You have threatened me and I get a little pissed off about that.........You can invoke your master and my MASTER will always be able to finesse, because HE is JESUS, the SON OF GOD.
JESUS died for your sins too Sara........you are not getting out of this world alive...........think about it.

12:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You haven't answered, you must be so busy trying to augment your coffers.
My GOD will not let your lord prevail. It is written. The CREATOR is the CREATOR, He sent HIS SON. By the way....JESUS died for your sins too Madam. All will play out Sara, it is written and so it will be.
Lucifer is having a blast with computer technology........that being is in his final moments, the final showdown. HE CAN'T WIN.

Lucifer has so many "enlightened" people to do his bidding.....you're just one of them, and you relish your role.

Sara, you are an absolute decrepit, spiritually bankrupt woman. Have you ever wondered why you could not be a Mom? I KNOW!!!!

Jesus Christ would never,ever allow you to birth a baby.........have such dominance over an innocent. There are horrible mothers who kill their babies..........you were not allowed even that. Think about it.

Look in the mirror....do you see pretty.....of course not. What you see is a bug-eyed, obese, very unattractive human being. So fraught with chronic illness, right Sara?..
Boo-Hoo honey. So ugly,so not sought after. Are you so pissed off that you never went to your Prom........You are a nasty piece of work Sara......if you thought nobody wanted you then.......look in the mirror now! Evil begets evil.........I went to 3 proms Sara and I couldn't have cared less about being on the cheerleader squad. Would I have made it....PROBABLY.
You are the embodiment of evil Sweetie........your friend

10:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Sweetie. Do you check in once and a while?
Your sleep will be interrupted....it is designed. Seen any Doctors lately? Psychotrophic medication cannot help you and self medication only lasts so long. Eventually you gotta get up and look in the mirror....horrors!!!!!!!!!!
GOD made you perfect and satan made you the image that looks back.
It was pre-ordained that you would never have a child..........may GOD help an innocent animal in your care........and believe me, HE will.
You are the snake Sara, perhaps you have the gecko. I pay attention Sweetie.
You are pure abomination Sara Benjamin....aka Mrs. Walter Rhodes. The fat, ugly woman that wrote to convicted murderers so she could get a date. Qu'elle suprise!!! He responded. Qu'elle suprise, he married you. Are we freakin' kidding here??? He knew how to mould you. That man never had sex with you without being under the influence........Vegas odds I win.
Your true lover is the prince of darkness and he will drop you quickly, when he is finished using you.........you're just not important anymore.
Sleep well Sweetie......

11:43 AM  

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